O, sweet child. Tender, innocent thing. Way back then, you felt a rejection from the most important people in your life. Those you relied on for love and safety withheld it. Perhaps for just a moment. Perhaps on many occasions. Your small, sweet self felt lost and confused, hurt and abandoned. You wanted their love. Longed for them to see and embrace you. And they tried their best. They tried their very best and their best may have been a long way from good enough.
Ever since, you’ve been in a never-ending quest to win their love, to prove yourself, for them to know that you are worthy of love. An adult now in body, that tender, innocent child is still there, lost and confused, feeling hurt and abandoned. You’ve tried to prove yourself in every way; through career and relationships and success and a perfect body, but none of it has worked and now you’re so deeply tired of this endless, impossible quest.
But there is such good news! The unconscious is becoming conscious. All those feelings you didn’t know what to do with are rising now, coming to the surface. They come as a gift. An offering. An invitation. They ask to be held in the light of your awareness. They ask you to become profoundly intimate with them. Stay close. To feel all the feelings you’ve tried so hard to overcome – not feeling good enough; not feeling worthy; never, ever enough. Feel all this now. Let it move and flow through the body. There may be tears and intense sensations. You are safe. You are safe.
As you feel this energy move through you, notice how, no matter how intense it feels, you’re able to hold it. You’re bigger than whatever arises. You’re the container for all of this and you’re being asked to be that container consciously now, to lovingly allow and hold whatever comes.
Things will settle in the perfect time. The sensations and tears will ease. And on the other side, you will feel the freedom that comes from meeting those long lost feelings and drenching them in the loving light of your awareness. No longer suppressed or hidden away, your load is lighter and you realise that there is nothing left to prove and no love to win. You are worthy and you are free.
Love and courage,
Leah
Leave a Reply