When we consciously or unconsciously turn away from the authentic longings of our heart out of fear that we are not worthy of the lives we dream of, a deep sadness comes to make a home for itself within us.
The joy and light of our lives is replaced by a grey veil that weighs on us from dawn until dusk. We carry on with our necessary tasks, doing what needs to be done, but a thread of sorrow weaves itself through the fabric of our days. Life is carried as a burden rather than lived as a celebration.
Being a reminder of what we turned from and the life that might have been, sadness becomes an enemy we fear to face and our lives become an exercise in endless activity, conveniently preventing us from ever having to face this enemy.
But what we took for an enemy is really just a true and loyal friend. What is sadness but a glorious wind chime hanging outside our back door, gently and generously beckoning us back through the doorway of possibility?
We can tell ourselves that we are content with the way things are. We can tell ourselves that our dreams were never really possible anyway. We can tell ourselves that none of it really matters in the greater scheme of things.
But the song of sadness tells a different story. Sadness tells us that what we were longing for was also longing for us. Sadness tells us that though the stories of our lives are fleeting, mysterious fireballs in the cosmos, they matter. Sadness comes only as a messenger, asking us to take up the path of our hearts once more.
When we walk back through that doorway and take up that path, though every step is uncertain and without any particular promise, we find that the grey veil lifts and our hearts remember what it is to live life courageously as a celebration.
Love and courage,
Leah
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